New Year’s Eve
Well it is New Year’s Eve, another year has gone by. I have been thinking about trying this out for awhile so here goes. . . .blogging I tend to get so long winded at times perhaps this is a better place for me to express myself. Either way I hope y’all enjoy a bit. Planning on just sharing life a bit, the hopes and trials I am going through. Hopefully it will bring each of you a little hope, remind you of the blessings in your life and help you keep the strength and faith to keep at it wherever life is at for you at the moment.
For the last six weeks or so I have been driving to Topeka to work. The mornings start out dark, little to really see of the countryside. Then as the miles and minutes pass by this wondrous site begins to form. . . the hills begin to creep about, the trees and grass come to life. There the sun begins to shine down upon this land. Not a day goes by when my breath isn’t taken away in just a moment as I look over the land. I often wonder if this is the what our ancestors felt as they traveled across this land forging ahead to make a new beginning. Not really sure where they were going, what trials they would come across. They traveled across oceans to come here, to make a better life for themselves. Perhaps that is what brought me here, this feeling of making a new beginning. I have done that, tried to do that, continue to work at making a new beginning. This land touches my soul.
As a child I would sit upon this rock, a large boulder on the corner of the long driveway at my grandparents farm. I would sit there looking out at the wheat fields, out at the corn growing high, at the green of the alfalfa field just staring out talking with God, asking him all kinds of questions. Sometimes I could swear he would answer me and other times he would simply comfort me. Looking out upon the Kansas landscape I feel the same draw to reach down and make myself one with the ground I am upon, the same draw that God is right here with me and wants me to be here. I cant explain it, have argued with God about it on several occasions and yet his only reply is here. . . I am to be here, for what I do not know, for who I do not know.
And so here I begin, again. Yet the new beginning has always been here. I know this with an understanding I cannot always explain. Actually I am pretty bad at explaining it. I just know. How can one explain that. In the strangest way I got confirmation of that this past year. . . .sometimes letting go we are able to really truly accept and trust what God is doing. A good feeling, and just one of the last vestiges breaking away. Now for the new year. . . .
taken from New Year’s Eve:
Claire Morgan: And as you all can see, the ball has stopped half way to its perch. it’s suspended there to remind us before we pop the champagne and celebrate the new year, to stop, and reflect on the year that has gone by, to remember both our triumphs and our missteps, our promises made and broken, the times we opened ourselves up to great adventures… or closed ourselves down for fear of getting hurt, because that’s what new year’s all about , getting another chance, a chance to forgive. to do better, to do more, to give more, to love more, and to stop worrying about what if… and start embracing what will be. so when that ball drops at midnight, and it will drop, let’s remember to be nice to each other, kind to each other, and not just tonight but all year long.
and
Sam: Sometimes it feels like there are so many things in this world we can’t control. Earthquakes, floods, reality shows… But it’s important to remember the things that we can. Like forgiveness, second chances, fresh starts… Because the one thing that turns the world from the longing place to a beautiful place… is love. Love and any of its forms. Love gives us hope… Hope for the New Year. That’s what New Year’s Eve is to me. Hope and a great party!
For me, this new year begins with digging my heals in and working hard towards the goals God has put upon my heart – sometimes I have to really wonder why he does that but I give up trying to argue with him about it, he knows I will listen either way.. . . . grrrrr!!
Not sure exactly how he is going to pull this off, or me for that matter, lol but either way we (he and I) are somehow planning on that 40 acres this year, beginnings of that orchard, heading back to get that darn master’s degree, partaking in a craft sale this summer, and oh yeah see about giving back to my community. Not sure how this is all going to come together yet but I trust that God will lead me in the directions I need to go. He has done that in the past and feeling pretty confident he plans on doing so now. So here we go. . . on this crazy journey of life. Years ago he placed it upon my heart to help some folks out and I was so blessed to be able to do so. . . . have a feeling this is all about that, just not sure how he plans to work things out but hey I am here so I have a feeling the biggest hurdle has already been surpassed .
Well here we go. . . . the beginning of a new year